Que sera, sera - whatever will be will be

[shadows_have_offended]

The news took a while to settle and, honestly, Neil still isn't entirely sure what to do with the knowledge. He's a college student now--or, rather, will be in September. He doesn't sign up for classes for months yet, but he's already looked over the catalog at least three times, trying to think what he'd like to do, now that he knows what he wants to do. It's all a huge relief, in a way. Maybe he can do Shakespeare in the Park again this summer. Maybe things will start to shape up more brightly.

In any case, he's celebrating. He sent out texts to all his friends, promising music and drinks and food--and a dog--to be shared by all. He tidied up a little, even, not that his apartment is ever very out of order in the first place. He doesn't really know how to decorate for a party like this, so he doesn't bother. Just makes sure there's lots of food and that the drinks are neatly arranged and that Beau's crate is set up in the bedroom, covered but open, so he can disappear if he'd like to.

He's not sure who all will come, but that doesn't really matter. He's just excited that he got in. It's the next step in his life, and it's his own step. That deserves to be celebrated no matter what.

Comments

[patriotqueen]

Guy had the distinct impression that Neil wouldn't be decorating for a party. To be perfectly frank, with the exception of Christmas, Guy wasn't in the habit of decorating for a party much either. In London their parties had colour because of the people they invited. That was always much more important to Guy.

But this wasn't London and the guest-list wasn't his, so he couldn't trust this party to be lively. That, at least, was the excuse he had for arriving with a large set of helium balloons that read 'Congratulations' in varied shapes and colours.

After a brief hello and kiss to the host, he set out to find good spots to tie the festive balloons.

[shadows_have_offended]

It's a bit of a strange crew that's shown up for the night, friends and coworkers and the like, and Guy is a welcome bastion in the middle of it all, because he's just overwhelming enough to stop things from being awkward.

Because there's the potential for it. Benji and Elliot are here, and Harry's shown up, and Gabriel. Neil's feeling a little manic about having all of them in his apartment at once.

They part for a moment, and then Neil returns with scotch for Guy. "I may have not planned this as well as I could have."

[patriotqueen]

Guy tied one of his last balloons to a lamp and turned to Neil, to accept the drink. "Because you didn't decorate?" He asked, then smiled. "Or because you've invited all your lovers past and present into the same living room?" It wasn't a hard guess to make. It also was something Guy never really minded at his own parties, but people expected it of him.

[shadows_have_offended]

"Oh, I just think I didn't get enough food, you know. Terribly poor planning on my part." It's a mild, slightly hysterical thing to say, and Neil laughs softly. But Guy's right, mostly about having all these people he's been intimate with in a single room. He isn't worried, specifically, but it does make things a little strange.

"I wasn't just going to not invite people, though."

[patriotqueen]

"Don't worry about it," Guy assured. "It's only uncomfortable if you let it." Of course, in Guy's case more often the odd one out was the man he hadn't made a pass at. In any case he didn't mind any presence here at all.

"And this is your party. They can take it or leave it."

[shadows_have_offended]

Neil finds that he's not very worried about it, but he is a sensitive boy and he doesn't want to cause a fuss. But at least there are small things, watching people talk to each other and appreciating the overall bright, congratulatory mood of his friends all in one place.

He leans into Guy a bit and kisses his cheek. "It's not a bad party," he says. "And I'm glad you could make it."

It's only been a few months since they fell in together, but Neil is very grateful to have him as a friend. His life has changed rather a lot in those months, and Guy has had a serious--and seriously appreciated--hand in it.

[patriotqueen]

"Of course, I wouldn't miss it," Guy said, cheerfully with a little pat to Neil's cheek when he was kissed.

Neil mattered quite a lot to Guy too. He had become one of his dearest and closest friends here. He would deny it, but that was the reason he'd picked simple balloons as decoration. He didn't want to embarras his sensitive friend with cheeky decoration.

[shadows_have_offended]

Honestly, if Guy had shown up with some sort of travesty of decorations, something awful and potentially offensive or controversial, Neil probably would have loved it. It seems nothing can bring his mood down, not even the memory and reminder that he's missing quite a few friends here. Not just those that have left Darrow, but ones that have been back home this whole time.

He wraps his arm around Guy's waist and looks over the crowd.

"I used to have more lady friends than this," he says thoughtfully. "I picked up quite a few when I first arrived. What a miracle finding a queer bar has been."

[patriotqueen]

Guy leaned into the hold and joined Neil's gaze over the crowd. "This party is queerer than my parties in London, dear, and that's saying something," he teased.

[shadows_have_offended]

"That must be saying something." Neil laughs and smiles. It's a good crowd, but very heavily slanted toward handsome men, and Neil feels a little guilty about that at least. Hopefully, once he's gotten into classes, he'll make some new friends. Whatever he does for his birthday, he hopes that there will be a more even balance.

[patriotqueen]

It wasn't necessarily true, but it was the thought that counted. And Guy did approve of the abundance of handsome men that walked about the living room. "So, which one is your latest Francophile fancy?" He asked, always keen on gossip.

[shadows_have_offended]

Guy says it like that and Neil smiles and laughs a little. He finds Benji in the crowd, talking with a coworker, and leans over a little to discretely point him out. The burnished blond curls, the broad shoulders and earnest face; Benji’s exceedingly handsome, and was so shy and charming when they met at the club that Neil couldn’t help being rude with him in the bathroom that same night.

“There,” he says. “That’s Benji.”

[patriotqueen]

Benji seemed a picture of Arian perfection, the sort the Duke of Windsor and his consorts would drool over, sporting purely platonic hard-ons at the sight of those broad shoulders and impossibly blue eyes. In any case, Guy could certainly see the appeal as well.

"Oh!" Guy gasped. "I wouldn't mind a taste of him either."

[shadows_have_offended]

Neil laughs neatly and smiles, hardly affronted by the comment. If Guy hadn’t found him handsome, Neil might have been concerned for his friend’s health.

“You’re welcome to give it a try,” he says. “But he’s awful shy.”

[patriotqueen]

"Those are the best, dear," Guy assured. "Its divine when the red of their cheeks meets the...well, red of their cheeks," he quipped as he pinched Neil's arse to explain his point.

[shadows_have_offended]

Neil snorts a little, having to look away from Benji so it doesn't seem like he's laughing at his expense in case he glances over. He'll admit that he feels a bit of a mess, keeping all these men in some sort of balance. But he's having fun for the moment, and is quite certain none of them are interested in anything more serious. No need to make the same mistake twice.

"Well, I definitely can't take French now," he quips. "I'll spend the whole class thinking about that."

[patriotqueen]

Guy never minded people knowing he was laughing at their expense, so he didn't look away and winked at the boy when their eyes met. "Easier too," he added. "Unless you wouldn't mind being in the same class as a past fuck, or lover."

[shadows_have_offended]

"Oh, I wasn't worried about that, I suppose." He wasn't worried about Gabriel, at least. He's moved on, and Neil's--well, Neil's fucking other people, so that's a bit like moving on (except when it isn't).

He laughs softly. "I, uh. Actually I went to meet Benji after class the other day and realized they're in the same session and everything. They have study group together sometimes. So at least I'd already gotten that out of the way."

[patriotqueen]

Guy wasn't talking of Gabriel, but every conversation turned to that Irish blonde one way or another. 'Moved on' wasn't quite the wording Guy would use. Guy only meant that he would be stuck in a class with Benji long after the fun had passed.

"I was talking of Banjo, dear. But, yes, Gabriel too."

[shadows_have_offended]

Neil's hardly worried about being in a class with Benji, even once things have run their course, so he only shrugs a little bit. He does roll his eyes just a little bit at the teasing name.

"It's not like I'm seeing Benji," he says with a shrug, voice soft. He's been very clear on that with him.

[patriotqueen]

Guy saw a look on Benji's face and that look didn't seem very convinced of the casual nature of their affair. But Neil could figure that out. "I hope he knows," he said. "You wouldn't want to crush his big shy heart."

[shadows_have_offended]

Neil's perfectly aware of Benji's quiet infatuation in the same way that he's aware of Ellie's. It's nice to be wanted. He's enjoying it while it lasts, especially from such handsome boys.

"I've told him," he says rather plainly. "I'm not seeing anyone right now, it uncomplicates things."

In fact, it probably complicated it more, but that's neither here nor there.

[patriotqueen]

Elliot was easily charmed and he loved all the attention given to him by the out-of-towners. It was easy to fall for sweet Neil, especially since he was getting more and more convinced that Guy was growing tired of him. He never held any illusions that he was the only one for the man, but he did always feel appreciated. A while back he asked him where their relationship was going. Guy had laughed in his face. 'I am going out' he had said before leaving for the night. Neil was sweet and perhaps hooking up with him was a little bit of revenge (Guy did seem to be particularly fond of Neil). In any case, it hadn't affected Guy at all, leaving Elliot to wonder what he was doing still with the Englishman. Except that was a very difficult trail of thought to maintain when Guy was being sweet, fun and charming.

"I'm just saying, lovely," Guy told Neil. "They can get awfully attached." Ellie, for example, had grown quite ridiculously attached, and while Guy did like him very much, there was no need for silliness.

[shadows_have_offended]

It seemed a terribly silly warning, since Neil knows. He tends to be the one that gets attached, though, and while he knows that Ellie and Benji are a bit more attached than he'd like, he's trying desperately to just exist, just breathe.

"It will work out however it's ought to," he says with a smile. "And be fun while it lasts."

[patriotqueen]

The warning was for Neil, who could also get awfully attached. So, Guy was pleased Neil knew not to get too invested. "I'm sure it is," he replied wickedly. "Don't wear the poor boy out too much."